Listing Your Attendants in Your Wedding Program

It’s up to you whether or not you want to list wedding partic­i­pants in your wedding program. What you don’t want to do ever with your wedding program is include too much information.

You do want to let people know what’s going on, but you don’t want to provide distrac­tions from the cere­mony. So, forget about the long histo­ries of your wedding party, they can go some­where else! If you want to write anything other than names on your program, you can say simple things, such as “groom’s best friend from child­hood,” or “bride’s college roommate.”

But really, just listing their name is plenty. That will give people the incen­tive to talk to them at the recep­tion and find out who people really are.

This is lovely, if you overlook the fact that they opened it the wrong way!

This is lovely, if you over­look the fact that they opened it the wrong way!

Tip: Choose your nearest and dearest to stand with you and if you want to embellish, write note before the list that says some­thing like: Mary and Matt would like to thank their friends and family for standing with them as they make their wedding vows.

What to Put in Your Wedding Program?

I get this ques­tion all the time. And my answer is always: far less than you think.

During the wedding cere­mony, you want people to be paying atten­tion to the wedding cere­mony. If people have reading mate­rial in their hands, they will pay atten­tion to that. Guar­an­teed. So, what belongs there?

  1. Names of Participants
  2. Order of Service
  3. Dedi­ca­tion

Tip: Leave anything else out for post wedding hand­outs. You were wondering how to get your cousin’s niece involved anyway!

Halloween Bride: Resist the Spooky

You may love Halloween, but in your marriage, there will prob­ably be only about 50 of them. Most of your marriage will be lived as your­self. So resist the over­whelming urge to go ghoulish for your wedding.

You and your beloved want to be married as your­selves, as openly and vulner­ably as you can. Camp is fun. Camp it up for your recep­tion if you want (although if you’ve just spent one of the most impor­tant half-​​hours of your lives looking fabu­lous, why change then?

Tip: You want your guests to dress up? Great. But you, make these promises with a straight (and unpainted!) face. Then next year when you’re looking for costumes, go as a bride and groom. Be the people you most loved being! (and get some use out of that wedding dress!

Happy the Bride It Rains Upon

Neither snow nor sleet nor dark of night is going to keep a bride from making it to her wedding. But let’s be sensible here. (I know, I’m shocked to hear the Wedding Priestess utter the S word myself.

Winter’s coming and you’ve got to get to the church, club, restau­rant. Odds are the weather will not be perfect and the ground will be messy, slippy, whatever.

I know you want to capture all those lovely pictures getting dressed at home. Once you do, take the dress off, put your sweats and your boots on (a perfect accom­pa­ni­ment to the veil) and get to the loca­tion without worrying about getting your hem wet, your shoes dirty or freezing.

Once you get that cold it’s hard to warm up. Brides who are freezing are NOT focusing on the wonder of marriage, they’re wondering if their feet will ever thaw out.

Tip: There’s a cute saying for every kind of weather, but mostly they were just covering bases. Dress warmly to get where you need to go and then slip into your dress. You’ve got help. Stay warm and clean! And let a smile be your umbrella on your wedding day! And don’t forget your shawl!

Creating your Community Statement of Support: Needing the binding

If you’re going to get support from your commu­nity, it’s really helpful to acknowl­edge that you under­stand that marriage is chal­lenging as well as wonderful. Too many weddings focus only on the plea­sure and not on the work of marriage. Too many people split up because they under­es­ti­mate the work involved in making a live with someone else. And making it look magical and wonderful — that’s an expo­nen­tial increase in effort. Most people will tell you it’s well worth your while, but it is hard work.

Tip: You want to let your commu­nity know that you admire the ways in which they have made their rela­tion­ships flourish and that you will be needing their support so that you can thrive. You’re going to need them to listen to you and turn you around and shove you back towards home when times are tough. They’ve always supported you and that’s why you’re going to keep looking to them for guidance.